Tuesday, November 15, 2011

The reason (sad, sorry excuse) I've not posted for a while

Sorry for my absence - got so, hmm, how shall I say this? FRUSTRATED with dad last Thursday (11-10-11) that I ended up calling 9-1-1 to be taken to an ER (dad wouldn't drive me to Elgin Mental Health Center) went to St Alexius, from there to the most remarkable facility - remarkable in that they were so overt on the spiritual aspects of being human, that, for SOME of the psychiatric bent, it would have been borderline grounds for commitment of the institution - for believing in something bigger than our selves, fate, a God Who watches over us ..

But, by and large, it was just a place to house people with problems that the legal system does not (yet) want to deal with as criminals ... and basically the staff spent most of its days eyes buried on the computer screen, or hanging out at the nurses station and talking - which explains why they let this one guy out of their sight and he ended up walking into my room, and opening the bathroom door, that I was inside the bathroom (gargling only) ... frickin creep - and I called them on it.

I was also the one that told them that my roomie, Alonzo, who had three voices that he would talk in, got very cold at night, shivered like crazy, which kept him awake, until I got him an extra blanket and an extra sheet, after which he fell asleep in about 5 minutes, snored for 15, then slept the rest of the night through, without waking, like a little loved-by-God baby ...

Met some very nice, wonderful people, who kept me grounded (this always happens) and also met the most manipulative person ever in my life (hospital staff characterized her as "an incredibly high-functioning psychotic" and ended up getting released, just tonight, without even asking to be released (they had a huge population influx, which explains THAT) ...

Hopefully dad (whose last words to me were, "Who's going to take care of me?" ... jeezuz h krist on a krost, RALPH - must EVERY"THING be about you? you are not quite getting "it" that I would RATHER BE IN A NUT HOUSE than living here with you (as the present relationship has unfolded) .. but, I think he's starting to get it ... he has lost another 6 pounds in my absence, he's shrunk at least 4" since mom died, his primary physician REALLY thinks he needs the colonoscopy and MEANWHILE - he avoids grief counseling as if it were a rattle snake or syphlittic slut ... me thinks ... he is not long for this world (I guess he'll be dead within a year of mom's death - just like his own mother went after his dad died; within one year)

At that point in time, my life becomes my own, for the first time ever.